Thursday, March 5, 2009

Tool Time

Anyone else feel like a complete tool when ordering at Starbucks? ...Or is it just me.

"I'll have a grande, non-fat, no whip, peppermint mocha, extra hot." Just typing that out, I feel like a pompous dork.

It always makes me think of You've Got Mail during one of the email voice-overs (courtesy of IMDB):

"The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the hell they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino."

Doesn't mean I'll stop ordering them anytime soon, but there will be a part of me that will cringe every time.


  1. Me too! I also hate it how if you order out of sequence the baristas will passive-aggressively correct you.

    "I'd like a decafe grande non-fat latte with hazelnut."

    "Ok, one GRANDE NON-FAT DECAF HAZELNUT latte you tool?"

    "Yes, and thanks for making me feel like an idiot!"

  2. YES! Totally. I never remember to say "no whip". I forget that it automatically comes with whip cream, so they have to ask.

    THEN they repeat it back to me the PROPER way.

    It's a good thing those foo-foo lattes are so damn tasty!

  3. "My" barista told me he is bored with my drink - tall, non-fat, extra hot latte with 1/2 pump mocha. I finally figured out how to order and now he wants me to change it? I don't think so!! ;-)


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